Have you seen Jesus?

Good news! I have seen Jesus right before my very eyes.

~O~

I was still a kid and my memories aren't vivid now, but I recall how I was quarrelling with my cousin over something I bet was childish, as well. We were both crying, standing at the opposite sides of the wall, refusing to make peace with each other. But you see, Jesus was there... in the form of an old woman with black and silver hair. She beckoned both of us to come. With both of us sitting in her lap while almost gasping for air out of crying so hard, she would remind us not to fight because we are cousins and we should love each other. And just with that, we hugged and kissed and went back to climbing the roof of the "trike" and staring at the sky.

Jesus was also there when I was in high school all alone in Bicol for a few days. She would spoil me with what little food she had at their home. Sardines, tuyo, daing or meat loaf... she would even buy a sachet or two of milo for me; even if she hardly have enough money for everyone in the house, or to pay bills. She gave me more than she can and should've but it was fine with her, she was happy to give me all she has. Yes, hardly anything for her, but I had more than I can ever ask for at her care.

This I clearly remember. She would have late night talks with me. 'Coz I always stayed late for school stuff and she would always be by the dinner table drinking coffee with her usual fita. I would come by late and eat, but not for so long, yet she would tell me how she enjoyed that moment with me and that she is happy, having someone like me, an apo, to talk to. But I guess I myself might get bored at having my own room with nothing else to do. She would tell me stories of some relatives to some degree I don't know who anymore.. but I bet she does not care whether I got it all, as long as I was there. Too bad I always had something to do to cut everything short. Really, too bad.

It'll always linger in my mind how she'd sincerely thank me for evey kiss and hug i'd gave her before I leave for school and when I get home. She'd always jokingly refuse and say "Baho na ni Lula!" But i'd kiss her anyways. Really, I CAN do something more but for her these acts of love weigh  much much more than my shortcomings and faults. She would always look at me with a look that rid of my imperfections, a look of pure love.

How I wish I can see that face and hear that voice till now.

~O~

She wasn't really Jesus, she was my Lula. But her love and every bit of it is Christ-like. I haven't really seen Jesus nor touched Him, but  I bet my Lula's love is a piece of His love. With this, I just can't simply imagine the immensity of love that God can give.

We people always question who Jesus is or where he is or if his existence is true in the first place. But most of the times, we are looking at the wrong places at the wrong time. Jesus is just around us and his love, the proof of his existence, is too! Jesus is in your neighbor, in your friend, in your mothers and fathers and sibblinga or even random strangers who show you that the world isn't a rotten place after all. Jesus is in the people who've given you a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold, time beyond tasks, understanding beyond judgment and love instead of hate and indifference.

It may also be that face in the mirror.

~O~

So have you seen Jesus now?