Of Sacrifices

I've been working and patiently waiting for the time when I can fully and without shame say to the Lord...

"I lay it ALL down at your feet."

~O~

My life and the world to which this life on mine revolves is a constant choice between my personal desires, what I want... and what I don't want for me, what I don't find comfortable and convenient. The greatest and the most painful decisions we have to make come from those where a yes or a no might just mean the hard way, or the high way. And most of the time, I take the high way.

~O~

Our God had an only son named Jesus. He, too, was God - Almighty, all-powerful, PERFECT. Then there were humans who sinned, and continued sinning. It was written that the wages of sin was death. But this mighty God, this perfect God, loved these sinners so so much. So he sent His one and only Son, Jesus, to the earth. He allowed Him to become human. Not a human with mighty powers, but a pure human being who hurt and felt pain, who cried and laughed and felt tired. If he weren't human, how else would he be a qualified die for these people's sins? God loved them so much that he allowed His son to suffer, and this Son of His, accepted everything openly. Again, because of love.

~O~

I started to ponder on the things I am willing to sacrifice, on how much comfort I can give up. Convenience is the greatest gift of this world. This is probably why sacrifice is rare. But to a certain man named Jesus Christ, this wasn't the case. Jesus DIED on the cross for us. Sacrificing comfort is one thing, but giving up your life... that's just profound. And dying for unworthy people? That's another story.

I think the reason why we hate sacrifices and love comfort so much is that we do not yet fully understand that we ourselves breathe every ounce of air because someone made a sacrifice for us. And this someone is a God who turned human. A GOD who went DOWN and became human. How immeasurable is that love? The moment this truth was revealed to me... sacrifices meant joy :)

Of course, it would hurt, it would mean doing what you wouldn't usually do, doing what's against your personal will, accepting people's misjudgement, and bearing God's cross. But there's joy in it. Why? Because there's nothing left to do but give back. Because there is joy in knowing we show love to the one true God that loved us faithfully. It's not easy, it never will be. But then again the things that matter are difficult to achieve.

~O~

This is my dream, to just look into the humbling sacrifice Jesus has made for me and allow it to let go of every inch of me - in service and in love. I'm not even near perfecting this craft, but I ought to be patient against my struggles, for God has always been patient with me. And a time will come when not only me, but all the others to whom this humbling truth has been revealed, we'll all be shouting shamelessly that...

"We lay it ALL down at Your feet!"

Of Chases and Walks

A chase - this is how life used to be for me.

~o~

The busy streets of Manila is something unimaginable for a probinsyana like me. Heavy traffic is a myth, clothing brands are unnecessary and malls higher than 3 floors are exaggerations for the simple city of Tabaco in Albay, from where I'm from. Ironically, though, the chase and the game of life I was in was no different from the manic days of an everyday Manila life.

My high school days were full of competition that even "time" was neither an enemy or an ally. It did not prove to be any slower knowing I'm away from the urban buzz. Surely, man's natural desire for achieving and searching for self-worth kicked in during these times. I knew I belonged somewhere, or at least I needed to belong somewhere. Those days were full of chase. A chase to meet deadlines, a chase to meet grades, a chase to top exams, a chase to win contests and a chase to build and distinguish oneself. This is the chase to attaining something seemingly unattainable - happiness and success.

And I must admit, most of these races I was in, I propelled with my OWN will power and strength.

Achievements came as glory; and failures? They dawned like a leech that drains your entire being, until you're hollow. It was tiring, yet rest was something elusive. I was always tired at the end of the day.

~o~

A walk - this is how life with Him is. A breeze in the park, a day watching the clouds go by. Yes, everything is the same yet entirely different. My world is no longer a chase. It is a wonderful journey. Still one with struggles, which i'm happy to offer. Why? Because I know don't need to worry about anything. I am given what I need :) Will power and strength is no longer my fuel, but rather they are fuelled by HIS POWER and LOVE.

I already know belong to something, to someone - and that is to Him and His mighty love. I no longer have to chase material achievements, for He looks at the heart not at the quantity of work. Meeting of deadlines, grades, and achievements did not get me to the unattainable worldly success and happiness, but happiness with Him will lead me to achieving, achieving beyond what I imagined and beyond the definition of this world.

Above all, amidst the chase, the stress and the race, the struggles... there is rest and peace and love in Him.

~o~

I know I am loved. You are, too :) It did not matter who I was, how I was before... He just LOVES.

~o~

"Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him."

~Psalm 37:7